INFINITUDE

Infinitude Gouache on paper 30 x 42 cm 2010

I've been working on some works on paper over the last 10-12 days. A number of them have been torn up in frustration. But I know this will happen, because after every exhibition, when a new body of work is trying to express, I fumble and stress about what I am doing. This is a phase...as my Mother used to say whenever either of my 2 brothers or I were behaving in a certain way, she'd say, 'It's just a phase'. So, whilst I might tear up work in frustration I know the phase will pass and some kind of fluidity of thought and action will appear...and then next phase happens.

Well, I have to say, I am feeling the fluidity...because I am rather pleased with 'Infinitude', which is above. It is the result of a number of torn up works, and about 7-100! different layers of oodles of paint and water. Once I was happy with the background I started the detailed surface work. Well....there were times when I walked away and would only return when I felt the urge to tear subside, because I felt 'in-my-bones' that this one was doing something that made my heart sing! The struggle and suffering are worth it...

That sounds a bit dramatic...struggle and suffering. But, creating a painting is a dance between the struggle and the heart singing! It is what gives a sense of something which is just not seen but felt [I mentioned this in my last post too].

So...what was I thinking about when I painted 'Infinitude'? A multitude of things actually. This is part of the struggle. After an exhibition [like FRISSON which I have just held] there's an urge to develop ideas that continue previous work, but new ideas also emerge. The new ideas are most likely connected with the previous body of work, but diverge. The result is that the imagination is overindulged with ideas! Not a problem really! But, it does take some time to work through. So...back to what was I thinking about when I painted 'Infinitude'? One of the main things I was thinking about was 'freedom'..now that opens up a universe of issues!

I wanted to create an image that oozed boundless space and possibility to give the impression of borderlessness and never endedness...like flying through timelessness. I wanted to create an image that appeared to have no beginning or end, as if perspective had been replaced with a sense of simultaneous closeness and farness. Maybe like a simultaneous beginning and end, and thus the possibility of something new...maybe a new dimension? I wonder what would we and the world do if there was a new 'beginning', but one where we retained the knowledge experienced across millenia in this dimension. Would we be more compassionate towards ourselves and others?

So, now that I am back in the studio I am indulging in ,and struggling with, lots of ideas! As readers can probably tell, perspective and distance will still keep me occupied for some time. I have also got new ideas for my much loved transcultural/religious tree-of-life. AND, maybe some more figures in my paintings too.

Till next time,

Cheers,

Kathryn